open post.

[sheers]

Comments

text;

[thermos]

[ oh boy. oh boy, he can't believe he is actually going to do this.

it's okay, nate. you got this. you got this. probably(?). ]

hey puppy, are you busy? i want to talk to you about something.

[sheers]

[ oh ey it's one of his boys ]

yeah? what's going on, i'm making dinner.

[thermos]

oh. is this a bad time then? because i can wait.

[sheers]

this is fine. we can talk. did you miss me?

[thermos]

yeah of course! i always miss you.

[ okay, okay. here goes nothing. ]

actually, im not sure if youve noticed but i really really like you, puppy. i know there are other guys youre seeing, but i was wondering if there is a chance youll become exclusive with only me?

i promise ill treat you very well! ill give you whatever you need and ill try my hardest to make you happy.

[sheers]

[ oh. oh no.

oh nooo. ]

i knew you liked me but not like this. when did that happen? why do you like me like that? are you sure? because maybe you just miss me a lot, we haven't seen each other for a while.

[thermos]

i dont think i can tell you when itd happened, but this definitely isnt a recent thing. ive liked you for a long time now. ive just been too scared to confess to you.

it drives me crazy to know youre having sex with other guys when were not together and i want that to stop. i want you to be mine only. can you give me a chance, puppy? please

[sheers]

[ he is completely not prepared for this, because when has anyone ever actually liked puppy for himself? that never happens. it didn't happen with feng, it didn't happen with az, why would it happen at all?

puppy wants to ignore this, but he's self-aware enough to realize that he shouldn't. ]

i like you too, nate. but i don't know if i can promise something like that. to be honest i'm not sure i want to.

[thermos]

[ honestly, it would be a lie if a part of him didn't expect it to turn out like this. it's why he waited so long to confess to him. he can feel his heart sink to the pit of his stomach all the same as he reads his message twice -- as if looking over it again will somehow alter the text.

he is seriously, seriously glad he did this over the phone. he doesn't think he can face puppy right now. does that make him weak? ]

oh
oh ok

im sorry. i didnt mean to push my feelings onto you. [ weak. ]

[sheers]

[ WHY DOES HE FEEL HORRIBLE RIGHT NOW ]

you didn't do anything wrong, nate. please come see me, let me make it up to you? i don't want you to feel bad about this.

we'll get past this so don't worry, okay? i still like you. this doesn't change that.

[ please don't leave me. ]

[thermos]

[ he wants to cry. ]

i know

but i think i need some time to myself if thats ok with you. sorry

[sheers]

[ nate's not the only one. ]

please don't leave me, nate. i'll do anything else. everything else.

[thermos]

lets talk about this later k? dont worry, i wont leave you.

[ tmw your heart has been completely shattered but you're still thinking about the person's feelings. ]

[sheers]

[ this is why he doesn't mess with the feelings, they are confusing and upsetting and AWFUL. ]

can't we just talk about this now? tell me what i'm doing wrong. tell me what else to do.

[thermos]

youve done nothing wrong

just give me some time. take care of yourself, bye

[ sorry, he really needs to cry and he can't cry if he's trying to put up a brave front for puppy over text. ]

[sheers]

[ it's like feng all over again. should he have lied? should he have just gone with it? puppy doesn't want to feel like this. it's disgusting and horrible and it makes him feel like shit. ]

i'm always here. i'll wait for you to come back.

[ it's the only thing he knows to do: to hold on even when he's not wanted. ]